If you're travelin'

Moving across the country. I can’t believe we did it! It seemed like such a monumental task, and in some ways it was. For the most part, it was a much better experience than we expected. We’ve had a month to reflect on it, so here are some lessons we learned, in case you ever find yourself in this situation.

1. Purge, purge, purge.

When you're paying by the foot in a moving truck, it's time to have a heart-to-heart with the things you think you can't live without. Plus, we had a three-bedroom house and needed to downsize for what we thought would be a small apartment in California. We had at least three rounds of getting rid of stuff. The first phase was the most difficult, for me at least, because I'm a sentimental person. I have a keen appreciation for items that are passed from family to family. The more we got rid of, though, the more I wanted to purge even more. Every couple of months, we would go through our stuff again. We had two garage sales (one of which was held three weekends in a row). We donated at least two car-fulls of stuff. And we gave meaningful items to meaningful people. Our mahogony dining table from Two Mom went to Pat's sister Alli and Mykl. Our nice grill, a housewarming gift from my parents, went to René, as thanks for letting us live with her. Our piano, also from Two Mom, went to our dear friends Craig and Shawn, who want their boys to learn to play. It is much easier to part with things when you're passing them on to people who will love them just as much.

2. But don't purge everything.

So, we didn’t end up in a tiny apartment after all. We ended up in a house. I don’t regret selling what we did, but there are a few items we now have to purchase that will end up costing us more than if we’d kept them. I’m very glad we kept our favorite pieces of furniture, because we have familiar pieces to warm up an unfamiliar home. And I’m glad we kept my car. We came very close to selling it before we left. It’s older, needs some TLC and we weren’t looking forward to the expense of driving two cars across the country and registering both in a new state (with stricter, more expensive emission standards that we don’t meet … ahem). We went back and forth on this quite a bit. I’m happy with our choice. We own the car free and clear, and we don’t have to worry about coordinating our schedules on one car, which is one less headache in a sea of life adjustments.

3. Find yourself some good boxes and a Super Mom.

I’m very lucky because I worked at a hospital, which gets huge shipments of computers all the time. Computers come in nice boxes. With handles. I was able to get tons of them. If you ever need moving boxes, I recommend calling some of the large companies in your area, like hospitals and schools, and ask if they have any boxes on their way to the recycle bin.

Once you’ve got boxes, make sure you have an awesome, amazing, helpful mom like mine. She visited us for almost two weeks and packed up the majority of our house. And I tell you, she is an Expert Packer^TM. As we opened boxes in our new house, I would literally gasp as I discovered items so perfectly snug and fit, every inch of space maximized. Each box was helpfully labeled (my favorite one: Dremel Tool, Crock Pot, Owl). Mom, I don’t know what we would have done without you.

4. Don’t hire movers. Do hire a trucking company.

We got many quotes from different companies and the prices ran the gamut. I was surprised that the bulk of what you pay is for people picking up heavy things for you. Silly me, I would have thought driving an enormous truck 1,500 miles through mountains would be the most costly part. If you cut movers out of the equation and simply buy space and transportation, it’s much more affordable. On an online forum, we read a recommendation for U-Pack. It’s essentially a semi container – very long and very tall – and you pay by the linear feet of space used. I reserved 13 feet. Pat took one look and said “We’ll do it in 9.” And darned if we didn’t use exactly 9 feet. (The Jacobs family is known far and wide for their ability to Tetris objects together.) U-Pack was only a little pricier than renting a U-Haul, and we didn't have to drive the truck ourselves, thank goodness. Leave that one to the professionals!

5. Save up, because you’re going to spend some dough. 

We did everything we could to minimize and cut corners, but moving is moving, and there is a bullet to bite. We knew this going in and began saving for it two years in advance. Some major costs we ran into:

• Selling our house (Realtor fees, repairs). Those of you with more equity in a home might actually make money on this one, but not us. And, you know, recession.
• Car repairs/maintenance, for safety and gas efficiency on the long trek. Just so you know, there is an unspoken law: If you plan to drive two cars across the country, both of them will suddenly need major, indisputable repairs.
• Travel (gas, hotels, meals). We also treated the trip as a mini vacation, with a couple touristy stops along the way. I still regret missing this, and Pat is determined to go back for this.
• Moving truck. Much cheaper than movers, but still a pretty penny.
• New housing (deposit and first month’s rent). This may be significantly less if you’re moving to a state that does not begin with CALIFORNIA.

Thank you to everyone who helped us get from Point A to Point B and everywhere in between.

Title lyrics – Girl from the North Country, Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash

Tales of a past life

When I called home this week (late in the evening, since I can’t seem to remember that I'm in a different time zone), I told my dad to grab a pen to write down our new address. I rattled it off and spelled the street name for him: P-A-L-M-Y-R-A. Even as I did, I heard him shuffling into the next room. “Hold on, I’ve got to wake Mom for this.” For what?

“Jo,” he whispered. “What street in Orange did you live on when I met you?”

In a sleepy voice, she said: Palmyra.

Of all the gin joints, in all the towns. I knew my parents met in this area, but had no idea my mom lived in Orange at the time, let alone on the same street. Like so many other things about this adventure, there is a certain meant-to-be feeling around our new home.

We are mostly moved in and unpacked. That’s after seven trips to Home Depot and a four-hour marathon at Ikea. You might be surprised to know that I married an interior designer with impeccable taste. Pat had a vision and I think he nailed it.

Pat is keeping busy. He has a few projects on his plate, including something kind of big that I’ll let him share when he’s ready, and he is working on finding a part-time job to supplement. His main to-do is to establish long-term residency, so when he starts grad school in 2014 or 2015, he’ll pay in-state tuition. Right now, his top choice is California State University, Los Angeles.

I started my new job as Marketing Content Specialist at CHOC Children’s. What a great fit for me. This hospital is so highly regarded here, and everyone I’ve met loves coming to work every day. I can’t wait to see how my role can fit into the very cool things they’re doing.

Meanwhile, I'm still putting in a few hours a week freelancing for CoxHealth, and I’ve been so happy not to cut those ties completely. (Miss you guys terribly.)

We are trying to experience southern California as much as possible without breaking the bank. Our goal is to try something new every weekend. Thankfully most outdoor activities are free. We spent an afternoon at Laguna Beach. It was beautiful and relaxing and perfect. Except for the frigid Pacific waters, which I’m told is the norm. I may have to invest in a wet suit. We had dinner and went shopping at The Block, a fun outdoor retail area in Orange. I took Pat to a local brewery/restaurant there. It was delish, but Mother’s and Springfield Brewing Co. still have our hearts.

This past weekend, we went to a concert at the Hollywood Bowl. We bought tickets to see Vampire Weekend before we left Missouri. We had toured the Bowl a couple of years ago, but I was not prepared for a live show. If you ever have the opportunity to see a concert there – any concert – do it. The stage is at the base of a mountain, with rows of seats up one side and picturesque rocks behind the stage on the other. It creates an incredible sound experience. You are encouraged to bring your own food and drink, so it was fun picnicking and uncorking a bottle of wine in our seats. The band gave an amazing show. We had a blast!

This weekend, we’re thinking about traveling up Pacific Coast Highway for the first time to an L.A. beach, like Hermosa or Malibu. People are recommending all sorts of activities to us: hiking in the Laguna canyon, day trips to Santa Barbara and San Diego, taking in a Yankees (er, Angels) game. We can’t wait to do it all.

Title lyrics – Step, Vampire Weekend

Make this place your home

Hold on, to me as we go

As we roll down this unfamiliar road

And although this wave is stringing us along

Just know you're not alone

Cause I'm gonna make this place your home

Title lyrics – Home, Phillip Phillips

There are places I remember

We fell in love the moment we stepped in the door.

The afternoon sunlight pouring in the windows. The gleaming hardwood floors. The cows peacefully grazing only a few feet from the backyard.

We bought our first house in August 2010 and lived on a quiet street in Nixa for nearly three beautiful years. Pat and I have so many memories and lingering good feelings from that place. Oh, the things you give up in pursuit of a dream!

We put our house on the market in the spring of 2013, because we expected it to take six months to a year to sell, like other houses in our neighborhood. It sold in just two weeks. (A big shout-out to our amazing realtor, Patty Z.) It hurt to hand over the keys, but it's a relief that we won't have to sell a home from afar, and we know we will own another beautiful home some day. At the end of the day, it's just a building made of 2x4's and drywall. We can live happily anywhere. And I'm a superstitious person, so when things happen so serendipitously, I take it as a sign that we're on the right path.
 

Since we obviously weren't ready to move to California yet, our dear friend René offered up her spare bedroom for rent. What a gift! We could not have asked for a better situation, or a better roommate. We owe you big time, René.

So we moved into what we fondly call The Hutch (on Hutchinson Avenue). I've never seen the show Three's Company, but I imagine it was something like that. We shared a lot of laughs and bonded with Cooper the cat. Pat chipped in around the house (René appreciated having a resident spider-fighter) and I cooked. René and I would spend entire evenings drinking wine, working on a 1,000-piece puzzle and watching episodes of Murder, She Wrote. Pat may or may not have been a little overwhelmed by the estrogen in the house! 


Six months later, it's time for us to move again. Decent but affordable housing in southern California is, as you can probably guess, a little harder to come by. We spent the last month scouring real estate sites and Craigslist every night. The day before Labor Day, we got home late and I realized I had missed the new listings on Craigslist for two days. It was midnight and I was tired, but I got on anyway, and I found this post: Guest House for Rent in Orange, CA.

A guest house? Really? A lot of questions came to mind. But the thought of living in an actual house, rather than returning to the apartment life, excited us. The pictures looked good and the price was even better. The next morning, we could hardly wait for a decent time to call. The owner and I really clicked. My aunt, who lives in California, offered to meet her and take a look for us that day. Everything checked out.

It's scary renting a home sight unseen. We are doing a month-to-month lease, just in case. On paper, we feel like we're getting a great deal. It's 1,200 square feet with 2 bedrooms and 1.5 baths, and access to other amenities including a pool, guest room and home theater. Hardwood floors, all appliances provided including a washer and dryer, and utilities and Internet are paid. These things are unheard of in our price range! Fruit trees adorn the property. The house is literally a half-mile from my work. Oh, and it comes available the exact day that we arrive. Serendipity strikes again.

The moving truck arrives tomorrow and we leave in one week. California, get ready for the Jacobs!

Title lyrics – In My Life, The Beatles

Away and westward bound

We're going on an adventure, as Bilbo Baggins would say.

The world now knows the dream that Pat and I have had for two years, and for me, maybe my whole life. We are moving to California. And not just California, but southern California. L.A. The OC. Hollywood. Where the scenery is cluttered with brake lights and bumpers and a small apartment costs twice as much as our house. Yes, THAT California.

I grew up in Michigan, but I was born in California. I visited family there when I was a kid and was enchanted by it. In 8th grade, I proclaimed that I would go to Stanford University, because that was the only college I knew out west. I spent a summer there when I was 19, living with my aunt and uncle and nannying my two cousins. I have always felt the pull to go.

But it was Pat that approached the idea of moving. He was born and raised in Springfield, Missouri. Never lived anywhere else, never had the joy or hardship of exploring a new area and a new culture. He loves Springfield, but he wanted to taste something else. He also wanted to live somewhere that would more likely support his hopes for a career in music composition.

So, we made a list of cities. L.A. Seattle. Austin. Nashville. Portland. If you could live anywhere, where would it be? Always start with the biggest ideas and let practicality factor in later. We quickly realized that the L.A. area was the top choice for both of us. When something is right, it's right.

We started saving, researching and (if you know me at all) making spreadsheets. But also dreaming. Laying awake at night, talking in the dark. We gave it a secret name, Operation Cantaloupe.

We slowly told family and close friends. We were prepared to defend our crazy decision. Cost! Traffic! Distance! Earthquakes! But everyone was incredibly supportive. I love to tell the story of when I told my dad the news. I was armed with all of our responsible ammunition: we're saving money, we're prepared for anything. But he interrupted me right away and said with passion, "You've just got to live your dream. You'll always regret it if you don't." Now that is good parenting.

We made a visit in December 2012. We toured a dozen cities, experienced the freeways. We asked everyone we met to give us the hard truth: is this place worth it? It certainly is, they said.

Nothing worth doing is ever easy. I've repeated this to myself every day since then. We're leaving a place we love, jobs we enjoy, family and friends we will miss dearly. What felt like the exact right decision two years ago doesn't feel 100% right every day. I am here to tell you that chasing a dream is not easy. There are moments of doubt and moments of true terror. The one thing I know for certain is that we will look back on this decision and have no regrets. Here's to LIVING!

Title lyrics – Early Morning Rain, Elvis Presley